To Choose Wedding Vendors - Feelings Matter!
a good 'vibe" from florists,
photographers, and caterers is the
key to a successful wedding event.
we met our wedding
photographer, we just knew he was the right one," said
made Kevin and me feel so relaxed. I could just picture him at
the wedding, getting along with all the different personalities
and putting everyone at ease."
a wise bride. She didn't just consider the photographer's portfolio.
She considered the way she felt when she was with him.
have been engaged for any length of time, you probably have received
a wealth of advice about hiring wedding professionals.
you should look at samples of their work, get references, find
out how many weddings they have handled. All of these steps are
important. But for true peace of mind, I recommend you go one
step further and consider the experience you have when you're
talking to a vendor.
If that sounds
a bit too touchy-feely for you, remember that the whole point
of a wedding is the experience. That's why you plan for months.
That's why you're spending all this moneyso that the ritual
of making your commitment will be a very special experience for
you, your fiance, and all of your loved ones.
like most brides, there will come a moment when your wedding "takes
on a life of its own" and you become obsessed with the 'things'
that make up a wedding. They are important, of course. But the
people who make up your wedding are even more important.
thought about how the officiant you choose will play a large role
in setting the tone of your wedding. Or that your photographer's
personality will have an effect on the mood of your guests. But
the professionals who work behind the scenes will influence your
experience more than you might expect. Just think how much time
you will spend in meetings or on the phone with your caterer,
your wedding planner, and your florist. Their personalities and
their attitudes will have a lot to do with how much you enjoy
your engagement, as well as the wedding itself.
that her florist helped her out with much more than the flowers.
one of those days when I just hit the wall. When I got home, I
had a message from my florist saying that some of the flowers
I wanted were not available and would I call her to talk about
substitutions. Great! In the state of mind I was in, that felt
like a tragedy. But when I talked to her, she sounded so confident
that she could create the same effect that I felt totally reassured.
She said, 'I've never seen a bride who was dissatisfied with my
work. When they walk in and see how beautiful the room looks,
they just look so happy.' Her voice was so calm and kind that
suddenly I felt betterabout everything."
a very different experience with her wedding
made a phone date, but when I called her, she was in a restaurant
downtown, in between meetings. There was a lot of hubbub in the
background and she was talking a mile a minute. When I got off
the phone, I told my fiancé that I thought she was more
stressed than I was! And it was contagious!"
One time when
you will really appreciate sensitivity is when you try on a gown.
woman I bought my gown from was a dear," said Allie. "When
I went in for my last fitting, I had gained a little bit of weight.
Every bride's nightmare! Not only did she make the dress look
good, she made me feel like I was just going to look beautiful
and a few pounds made absolutely no difference."
Karen is thankful
that her fiancé was listening to his intuition when they
hired a caterer.
on the verge of putting down a deposit when Dave said, "You
know, her portfolio is impressive and I'm sure the food would
be great, but I don't get the feeling she really likes weddings.
She just seems kind of impatient."
he was on to something. "And there are so many people who
do this work because they really love weddings, why work with
someone who doesn't?"
Karen is absolutely
right. There are many wedding professionals who delight in weddings,
respect your needs, and understand how important this time is
for you. Here are some questions to ask yourself to make sure
you find them.
Do I feel
calmer when I'm talking with this professional? Or more anxious?
Do I feel
Do I feel
Do I feel
like I have his full attention?
Do I feel
Is it easy
to air all my concerns?
The way you
feel when you're interviewing a professional is the way you will
feel when you're working with her. Pay attention to your experience
now and you can look forward to a wonderful wedding experience.
Claire Hatch, (Kirkland, WA clairehatch.com is a counselor who specializes in happier relationships
and turning conflict into closeness. She works with clients in her
Seattle area office and by phone around the world. She gives presentations
on conflict solutions and making your relationship the best it can